Malkovich?

For my thirtieth birthday party, I invited all my Angeleno friends and family down to my favorite local bar. The drinks were on the birthday boy, provided the guests arrived dressed as the host. This was easier for some than others...


That's mister Mark Rizzo, perhaps the night's most accurate Stern impersonator.

Paul Briggs, the talented story artist responsible for the awesome bechesthaired caricature on my myspace page, busted out some impressive nosewear.


Extra props to the Texan for drinking the Colt 45. Needless to say, it works every time...

The ladies were not spared. Jessica kicked it new-skool JPS while Robyn Reiter busted out a high school jersey to remind the doubters that I was, in fact, once Best Speaker in the Ways & Means Committee at New Rochelle Model Congress...


Some chose to highlight my more recent extra-curricular activities. Like roller derby (Chris supports the Fight Crew, while I am a known Tough Cookies fan)...


And Muay Thai...


That's Seth 'Hoff Man, Hoff Amazing' Hoffman in the MMA gloves.

The Humpty Dance was played, the TVs displayed my favorite tape from the 107 VHS collection (it involves a little bald man in kung fu pants teaching sexual techniques in a workout video format), someone urinated in the photo booth, the Derby Dolls inexplicably arrived in sailor suits, and people were kind enough to donate a bunch of calling cards to the local Union Rescue Mission. Go here if you'd like to join them.

Thanks to all. And if you got busy that night because you looked like me? Well, now you know what I'm dealing with all the time.